WTF?
In 1999, after a couple of years fiddling with that blogging thing on various other people's domains, I thought I had enough things to say to merit my very own corner of this here interweb. In 2007, I suddenly ran out of ammo. Thankfully, that didn't last forever... So, I'm back. Still not dead yet. Like a phoenix from the ashes. Behold.
recently :: 08.10
| Sun | Mon | Tue | Wed | Thu | Fri | Sat |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |
| 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 |
| 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 |
| 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 |
| 29 | 30 | 31 |
view archives :: monthly | the big list
latest flickrings
March 29, 2002
:: Once Upon a Time Last Night ::
The story of a girl, a boy, and a new camera.
After work, we went to the bar and had a few beers. After that, Stephen was very very hungry. So we went to Molly's house and had beer can chicken and matzoh ball soup and noodle kugel and burritos and mushrooms and chipotles and chips and salsa. There was a lot of cooking going on. We called it the Jexican Feast.
And when we had had too much wine, we left Molly's and went home.
The End.
[author's note: this entry was corrupted and the original comments entries lost. below are the comments that appeared with the post]
molly
http://www.girlwonder.com
it is made of beer cans. or rather, it has one stuffed up its um porkhole or something.
Andreas
This is what google has to say on the matter :)
http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=beer+can+chicken&hl=en&btnG=Google+Search&meta=
miss weeza
http://www.custom-deluxe.com
Actually, to clarify - beer can chicken is chicken grilled with a can of beer jammed up its butt. Dignified? Not really. But my, my, was it ever delish!
jima
jima@legnog.com
http://www.empty-handed.com
Ha ha ha! I don't get it.
amyc
http://www.rubbernun.com
Is that chicken made from beer cans?
March 28, 2002
:: Another Fine Invention ::
Another anonymous spokesperson, this time speaking on behalf of a major auto manufacturer, when asked to comment on this image, admitted that it's the top-secret new model, the MotorMouth (TM), due to be released in 2006.
March 26, 2002
:: For Immediate Release ::
Chicago, IL - An anonymous spokesperson for Cisco Systems, an industry leader in networking equipment, indicated today that the company has plans to release a new Blame Router(TM) to the public by mid-2003. The hardware will supplant older, offline blame-shifting processes, increasing organizational efficiency by up to 50% and freeing up former blame-shifting personnel to take on tasks more appropriate to their organizations' core competencies.
"Load Balancing in the Blame-Shifting world is critical," said the spokesperson. "We want to take this a step beyond the standard corporate fail-over system, to allow a broader and healthier distribution of blame."
The accompanying product, RetributionHub (TM), is still in development.
March 25, 2002
:: hyperthemic goofiness ::
The Oscars are such an interesting cultural artifact. Everything you need to know about culture, entertainment, charm and propriety is all laid out in this one event. Last night, over at Eric's to watch the festivities, I learned a great many things. Among them were the following:
1. Having a stroke makes you smile a lot.
2. Celebrities wearing black evening gowns are boring and bad. Fashion commentators wearing smocks apparently constructed from kitchen curtains are stylish.
3. J. Lo is preparing for the next John Hughes 80s Prom movie.
4. Sometimes deserving folk do win.
5. Movies depicting Disneyfied versions of real people's lives are the best movies. Clearly.
March 21, 2002
:: wisdom ::
I came across this tonight, which a friend of mine sent me some time ago. I thank him for it, and hope that i do not forget it again.
Hokusai Says...
Hokusai says look carefully.
He says pay attention, notice.
He says keep looking, stay curious.
He says there is no end to seeing.
He says look forward to getting old.
He says keep changing,
you just get more who you really are.
He says get stuck, accept it, repeat
yourself as long as it's interesting.
He says keep doing what you love.
He says keep praying.
He says everyone of us is a child,
every one of us is ancient,
every one of us has a body.
He says every one of us is frightened.
He says everyone of us has to find
a way to live with fear.
He says everything is alive-
shells, buildings, people, fish,
mountains, trees. Wood is alive.
Water is alive
Everything has its own life.
Everything lives inside us
He says live with the world inside you.
He says it doesn't matter if you draw,
or write books. It doesn't matter
if you saw wood, or catch fish.
It doesn't matter if you sit at home
and stare at the ants on the veranda
or the shadows of the trees
and the grasses in the garden.
It matters that you care.
It matters that you feel.
It matters that you notice.
It matters that life lives
through you.
Contentment is life living through you.
Joy is life living through you.
Satisfaction and strength
is life living through you.
Peace is life living through you.
He says don't be afraid.
Don't be afraid
Look,feel, let life take you
by the hand
Let life live through you.
Roger Keyes, Providence Zen Centre
March 19, 2002
:: food for thought ::
Can someone please tell me what possible good there could be in this? Specifically:
"Electrolux is field testing its Internet refrigerator, Screenfridge, in 50 homes in Copenhagen. This fridge, like its Korean counterparts, makes the icebox the center of home communications."
So instead of spending all my time sitting in front of my desk, I'll spend all my time sitting in front of the refrigerator? Oh, great. I'll be a Fatass in no time!
March 18, 2002
:: ah, the good old days... ::
March 16, 2002
:: Cocktails for the new millenium ::
Last night after work, Phineas and Stephen and Spence the bartender and I got to talking. We realized that the dawn of a new millenium calls for a few good new drinks. We further decided that the key to these concoctions must be the pre-emptive anti-hangover strike. Much brainstorming followed. I herewith present our list.
Scotch & Scope
Minty-fresh breath for that hottie down the bar!
Ketel & Pepto
Cousin to the Pink Lady, we like to call this one the Pink Bitch.
Absolut & Alka-Seltzer
Mmmmmm, fizzy...
The Classic Martini with Advil-stuffed olives
On the rocks or straight up, it's a treat everyone is sure to enjoy.
The Listerita
A refreshing Listerine margarita - fool your friends! Choke your enemies! [optional: garnish with an Epsom Salts rim]
and finally,
The Maalox Manhattan
Coats as it soothes, for instant relief on those nights when you've had too much anchovy pizza.
Enjoy, and please remember to consume responsibly!
n.b.: the authors of this website assume no responsibility for illness or death caused by the consumption of these or any cocktails
March 15, 2002
:: ...and now for something completely different... ::
This post by the infamous Davezilla seems a perfect opportunity to reassert my deeply held belief that, if Herr Nielsen insists on being such an irritating technological caveman, and furthermore as long as he insists on the spelling, we should all pronounce his name [yah'-kob]. I, for one, can't call him anything else.
Except for maybe 'asshole'.
March 14, 2002
:: on flying ::
i go places to find me
the farther the deeper
but i can't seem to go far enough
i have said i want to wake up
and pull back the flap to see
a morning like i've never seen
everything like i've never seen
beyond what i have seen i hope
to find what i imagine
and wake what sleeps in this self
the sun rises and sets there
the land is wide or rolling
or perhaps something i haven't dreamt
:: This Just In ::
It has been rumored that a top-secret cadre of American intellectuals is working on a 'Nietzsche Bomb' to accomplish the same goals without the need to send ground troops. More on this to come.
:: Terrorists to be Defeated by Despair, Cynicism ::
When I was in college, I had a French landlord with whom I had to sit on the floor of my apartment-to-be and drink a bottle of wine while engaging in philosophical debate before he would rent the place to me. He was, after one such evening, forever convinced that I was a "closet existentialist". Reading this (sent by Karen this morning, bless her heart) makes me wish it were true. Vive les Bérets Noirs!
French Intellectuals to be Deployed to Convince Taliban of Nonexistence of a Deity
[author unknown]
The ground war in Afghanistan heated up yesterday when the Allies revealed plans to airdrop a platoon of crack French existentialist philosophers into the country to destroy the morale of the remaining Taliban zealots by proving the nonexistence of God.
Elements from the feared Jean-Paul Sartre Brigade (the "Black Berets") will be parachuted into the combat zones to spread doubt, despondency, and existential anomie among the enemy. Hardened by numerous intellectual battles fought during their long occupation of Paris's Left Bank, their first action will be to establish a number of pavement cafes at strategic points near the front lines. There they will drink coffee and talk animatedly about the absurd nature of life and man's lonely isolation in the universe.
They will be accompanied by a number of heartbreakingly beautiful girlfriends who will further spread dismay by sticking their tongues in the philosophers' ears every five minutes and looking remote and unattainable to everyone else.
Their leader, Colonel Marc-Ange Belmondo, spoke yesterday of his confidence in the success of their mission. Sorbonne graduate Belmondo, an intense and unshaven young man in a black pullover, gesticulated wildly and said, "The Taliban are caught in a logical fallacy of the
most ridiculous kind. There is no deity despite the Koran, and I can prove it. Take your tongue out of my ear, Juliet; I am talking."
Marc-Ange plans to deliver an impassioned thesis on man's nauseating freedom of action, with special reference to the work of Foucault and the films of Alfred Hitchcock.
Humanitarian agencies have been quick to condemn the operation as inhumane, pointing out that the effects of passive smoking from the Frenchmens' endless Gitanes could wreak a terrible toll on civilians in the area.
March 11, 2002
:: I swear I did not make this up. ::
Sansabelt: they're not just for your funny-smelling octagenarian neighbor anymore...
:: Sport of Kings ::
This morning, I awoke to find my lower back stiff, my gluteus maximus* muscles sore and strained. During my morning yoga routine, it took me twice as long to twist to one side than the other, and some of the poses actually made me wince. But it's not what you think.
March 8, 2002
:: my horoscope ::
:: The dude abides, man. And ::
The dude abides, man. And I don't know about you, but it makes me feel good, knowing he's out there.
God bless the Brew & View. And god bless the Dude.
March 6, 2002
:: who's evil? ::
Apparently, U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft, in addition to thinking he's King David and thinking he's a songwriter, thinks calico cats are evil. Good thing he's never met my cat.
:: For those of you too ::
For those of you too cheap or agoraphobic to visit an actual salon, I present the alternative: the ultimate Home Hair Care Kit:
Bangs Made Easy and The FlowBee Precision Home Haircut System!
And if you really fuck it up, you can always head over to Lori's for a nice wig. Or a beautiful metallic turban.
This concludes our message for the day.
March 5, 2002
:: I guess it's true that ::
I guess it's true that the Real Estate market's not what it used to be.
March 1, 2002
:: thought for the day ::
You shoulda seen the rack on this chick!